• YOU WILL NOT UNDERSTAND (Mark Angel Comedy) (Episode 182)
    Articles,  Blog

    YOU WILL NOT UNDERSTAND (Mark Angel Comedy) (Episode 182)

    [Music] okay that society yeah Matt if you Costa for this idea if I slap you in the kids now hey Nate you ate yesterday but not resist today now we do that it yesterday see let me tell you something in this house will be eaten Tom bite on today’s your tone today’s my tone it’s me that Hey Baby hey baby how are you I’m fine you didn’t tell me yeah yeah that’s because I wanted to surprise you and yeah they can surprise what I got for us rice and I got it for both of us but the sauce Titan Marcus sent for me so I…

  • Five Nights at Freddy’s Puns and Jokes! (Annoying Orange FNAF)
    Articles,  Blog

    Five Nights at Freddy’s Puns and Jokes! (Annoying Orange FNAF)

    (playful music) – [Orange] So, this is your pizza place, huh Freddy? Did you build it with your bear hands? (Orange laughs) – [Freddy] Ugh. Please, no puns. I find them completely unbearable. (Orange laughs) – [Orange] Okay, I’ll stop. I’m beary sorry. (both laugh) (playful music) (screaming) Whoa, talk about hare raising. (Orange laughs) (Bonnie grunts) What, you didn’t like my joke? Gimme some notes. I’m all ears. (Orange laughs) (Bonnie growls) Uh oh, he’s hoppin’ mad now! Guess the bunnymoon’s over! (Orange laughs) (Bonnie growls) (playful music) Hey, how’d you two end up working at a pizza joint anyways? Let me guess, you wanted to make some dough?…

  • Tiffany Haddish Monologue – SNL
    Articles,  Blog

    Tiffany Haddish Monologue – SNL

    LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, TIFFANY HADDISH! [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] ♪♪♪>>WOO! THIS IS AN AMAZING NIGHT. I’M SO HAPPY TO BE HERE. YOU MAY KNOW ME FROM A MOVIE CALLED “‘S GIRLS TRIP”. QUEEN LATIFAH, JADA PINKETT SMITH, REGINA HALL, AND ME, TIFFANY HADDISH. NOW, OUR MOVIE MADE OVER $100 MILLION PLUS. OKAY? I’M TRYING TO FIGURE OUT WHERE IS MY CUT OF THE MONEY? I HAVE NOT SEEN IT AT ALL YET. MY FRIENDS TELL ME YOU ARE BIG TIME. YOU BALLING, OUT OF CONTROL. I’M LOOKING AT MY BANK ACCOUNT, HUH-UH. THEY WERE LIKE GOOGLE YOURSELF. SHE WHERE YOU ARE AT IN LIFE. SO I GOOGLE MYSELF. IT…

  • Mystery Wheel of Slime Challenge 2 w/ Funny Satisfying DIY How To Switch Up Game
    Articles,  Blog

    Mystery Wheel of Slime Challenge 2 w/ Funny Satisfying DIY How To Switch Up Game

    – Slime dump! – Three, two, one! – Oh no, oh gosh. You challenged us to make slime with blenders! (dramatic music) Alright, let’s spin for the first blender ingredient. Three, two, one! That is a solid spin. – Solid spin, nicely done. Good job. – Alright, I got white glue. – And I got packing peanuts. Wait, dude, you’re starting without me? How do I get mine? – Oh, well don’t worry, Devan, because I’ve actually ordered something that should be delivered right about now. (doorbell rings) – [Offscreen] Yeet! – Geez, what? – Yes, dude! It’s the Key delivery service, number four in America! – Wait, that’s my…

  • Real Teachers Watch Sex Education | Not Your Average Review | Netflix
    Articles,  Blog

    Real Teachers Watch Sex Education | Not Your Average Review | Netflix

    – I don’t know if I like this. – I don’t think I do. – Sex Education. – My favorite topic. – My least favourite subject. – Sex therapy clinic at school. Imagine if we had one of those running at our school. – No thanks. – Probably want us to watch something that’s gonna put us off a little bit. – Something sensible? – Possibly a documentary? – I’m thinking documentary. – Here we go. Get ready to learn something. – It’s not teaching related content. – SRE class. Apparently there’s been an outbreak of pubic lice. – Oh. This is a condom lesson. – So glad we teach…

  • pirates. drugs. gay marriage. // Auto-Tune the News #2
    Articles,  Blog

    pirates. drugs. gay marriage. // Auto-Tune the News #2

    Perhaps the Constitution envisions certain one-size fits all solutions… Booorrrring! I hear a foghorn! Boorrrrinnng! Élegislature override a gubernatorial veto… Guboringital! I–I’m not feeling any… romance between us right now. You gotta do it like this: Shawtayee! Ready, set, go! This was a pretty remarkable week on the gay marriage front. -First of all, to have a state like Iowa -Whatchoo tryna say about Iowa? – Not the east coast state… – East coast! – Not the left coast state… – Left coast! In a decision written by a republican appointee. Shawty, now you soundin so fine! Give me your number, we can bump and grind. Talkin about politics all…

  • Congressional Candidate Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez on Healthcare, Education & Voting
    Articles,  Blog

    Congressional Candidate Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez on Healthcare, Education & Voting

    >>THANK YOU, THANK YOU SO MUCH.>>Jimmy: HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU AS WELL. >>THANK YOU, YES. >>Jimmy: YOU HAVE A BIRTHDAY THIS WEEK ON SATURDAY. HOW OLD DO YOU TURN ON SATURDAY?>>I TURN 29. >>Jimmy: 29 YEARS OLD. HERE YOU ARE RUNNING FOR CONGRESS. NOT JUST RUNNING FOR CONGRESS, YOU’RE ALMOST CERTAINLY GOING TO WIN.>>KNOCK ON WOOD. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]>>Jimmy: FOR THOSE WHO DON’T KNOW YOUR STORY, AND I KNOW YOUR STORY A BIT, YOU BEAT A TEN-TIME INCUMBENT, A GUY WHO JUST ASSUMED THAT HE WAS GOING TO WIN. YOU CAME OUT OF NOWHERE, YOU WERE WORKING AS A BARTENDER, AND DECIDED THAT IT WOULD BE A GOOD…

  • President Jimmy Carter Is Still Praying For Donald Trump
    Articles,  Blog

    President Jimmy Carter Is Still Praying For Donald Trump

    >>Stephen: WELL, SIR, THANKS FOR BEING HERE. IT’S NICE TO SEE YOU AGAIN.>>IT’S GOOD TO BE WITH YOU AGAIN, STEPHEN.>>Stephen: HOW HAVE YOU BEEN? I HAVE BEEN FINE.>>Stephen: YOU’RE AN EXTRAORDINARY MAN. YOU’RE 93 YEARS OLD — AM I CORRECT AT 93?>>GOING ON 94, YEAH.>>Stephen: GOING ON 94, OKAY. ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) YOU HAVE BEATEN CANCER AND YOU ARE STILL — YOU ARE STILL WORKING TO MAKE THE WORLD A BETTER PLACE THROUGH THE CARTER CENTER AND THROUGH YOUR BOOKS. YOU’VE GOT A NEW ONE CALLED “FAITH.”>>”FAITH.”>>Stephen: AND A LOT OF PEOPLE WILL RELEASE A BOOK AS A TRIAL BALLOON BEFORE THEY RUN FOR PRESIDENT.>>I’VE HEARD ABOUT THAT,…

  • The Worst Job In History Of The World (FUNNY CARTOON ANIMATION)
    Articles,  Blog

    The Worst Job In History Of The World (FUNNY CARTOON ANIMATION)

    Everyone’s had the odd job they were forced to take when times were tough, and sometimes you can find yourself responding to some pretty odd job postings. Millions of people every day show up at laboratories and medical facilities around the world to be guinea pigs for dangerous drug trials or to test new gadgets and devices. While these jobs can be risky, and probably more than a little weird, what are some of the worst jobs in the world- that have ever existed?! vb One of the worst jobs in history certainly had to be that of a Punkawallah- a royal fan bearer in ancient India. With temperatures reaching…

  • Can I Go Blind from Playing Video Games? – Your Worst Fears Confirmed
    Articles,  Blog

    Can I Go Blind from Playing Video Games? – Your Worst Fears Confirmed

    Can you go blind from playing video games? 100%, and here’s how. Your eyes are made up of rods and cones that all float in the goo of the eyeball. If the rods or cones get damaged, or if the goo leaks out, you will go blind. How can video games disturb this precious eyeball ecosystem? Video Games are composed of 2-D images, plumbers, ninjas, Sims in jacuzzies. While your eyes are built to process 3-D images, plumbers, ninjas, Kims in jacuzzies. Doctors say that video games can cause strain on your eyes, but they can’t make you go blind. But doctors lie. That’s why malpractice insurance exists. Let’s say…